Are you in love or in need? Do you need someone to tell you how beautiful you are? Have you ever taken time to study/ evaluate yourself and decide what you want in a relationship? Most marriages end because the two partners rushed in without knowing what each wants in a relationship. There is a term falling in lust.This comes after one has been desperate for long and says,’who ever comes,we shall go’. This is dangerous because there has been no time for self introspection on who you are.
There is a lot of single shaming, so most folks are in the pressure to get married without tending to study oneself. I call that an intra relationship as opposed to an inter relationship. All that can be achieved in Singlehood. Have you ever gone out in a nice restaurant by yourself not with anyone else. Self love is important before you bring someone on. If you mixed up the wrong ingredients and put them in the oven, you would have bad outcomes. Similarly when two different people with different values york together,it always ends in tears as the young ones term it.
Marriage is the coming together of two individuals to love and to hold. Marriage is about working hard and complimenting each other. When two incomplete people meet up and decide to tie the knot, chances are high that things won’t work out. Self love is synonymous with Singlehood. Take your time and study yourself and find out who you are and what you want in a marriage and you will have a blissful marriage. Never be rushed to get in a relationship without loving self. Go buy that chocolate/book for yourself. I used to be asked,’Mwene, when are you getting Mrs Right’ my cynical answer was and still is ‘I’m a Marxist and we don’t look for Mrs Right, we look for Mrs Left,one that is intellectually sober, one who will treasure books more than makeup’.So if single, enjoy your Singlehood and if married, work hard at it.